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    Ultimate Definitions.......

    Wonderfully described definitions ....paradoxical
     

    Att00005

    MARRIAGE:

    It's an agreement
    wherein
    a man loses his bachelor degree
    and a woman gains her master

     
    Att00006

    LECTURE:

    An art of transmitting Information
    from the notes of the lecturer
    to the notes of students
    without passing through the minds
    of either

     
     

    Att00023

    CONFERENCE:

    The confusion of one man
    multiplied by the
    number present

     
     
     

    Att00010

    COMPROMISE:

    The art of dividing
    a cake in such a way that
    everybody believes
    he got the biggest piece

     
     

    Att00028

    TEARS:

    The hydraulic force by which
    masculine will power is
    defeated by feminine water-power!

     
     
     

    Att00001

    DICTIONARY:

    A place where divorce comes
    before marriage

     
     

    Att00024

    CONFERENCE ROOM:

    A place where everybody talks,
    nobody listens
    and everybody disagrees later on

     
     

    Att00018

    ECSTASY:

    A feeling when you feel
    you are going to feel
    a feeling
    you have never felt before

     
     

    Att00017

    CLASSIC:

    A book
    which people praise,
    but never read

     
     
     

    Att00020

    SMILE:

    A curve
    that can set
    a lot of things straight!

     
     
     

    Att00019

    OFFICE:

    A place
    where you can relax
    after your strenuous
    home life

     
     

    Att00022

    YAWN:

    The only time
    when some married men
    ever get to open
    their mouth

     
     

    Att00023

    ETC:

    A sign
    to make others believe
    that you know
    more than
    you actually do

     
     

    Att00010

    COMMITTEE:

    Individuals
    who can do
    nothing individually
    and sit to decide
    that nothing can be done
    together

     
     
     

    Att00012

    EXPERIENCE:

    The name
    men give
    to their
    Mistakes

     
     

    Att00001

    ATOM BOMB:

    An invention
    to bring an end
    to all
    inventions

     
     

    Att00003

    PHILOSOPHER:

    A fool
    who torments himself
    during life,
    to be spoken of
    when dead

     

    Att00018

    DIPLOMAT:

    A person
    who tells you
    to go to hell
    in such a way
    that you actually look forward
    to the trip

     
     
     

    Att00027

    OPPORTUNIST:

    A person
    who starts taking bath
    if he
    accidentally falls
    into a river

     
     

    Att00025

    OPTIMIST:

    A person
    who while falling
    from EIFFEL TOWER
    says in midway
    "SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

     
     

    Att00008

    PESSIMIST:

    A person
    who says that
    O is the last letter
    in ZERO,
    Instead of the first letter
    in OPPORTUNITY

     
     

    Att00014

    MISER:

    A person
    who lives poor
    so that
    he can die RICH!

     
     
     

    Att00009

    FATHER:

    A banker
    provided by
    nature

     
     

    Att00015

    CRIMINAL:

    A guy
    no different
    from the other,
    unless he gets caught

     
     

    Att00004

    BOSS:

    Someone
    who is early
    when you are late
    and late
    when you are early

     
     

    Att00001

    POLITICIAN:

    One who
    shakes your hand
    before elections
    and your Confidence
    Later

     
     

    Att00016

    DOCTOR:

    A person
    who kills
    your ills
    by pills,
    and kills you
    by his bills!



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    Att00013

    Att00011

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    Ultimate_Definitions........zip (127 KB)

    • 1 March 2011
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